Love Lost & Found | Part I: Love is a skill.

Love Lost & Found.

What could me more worthy of dedicating space to than love?

Sharing stories, symbols and suffering from love lost.

Discovering hope, belonging, acceptance from love found.

From what I’ve learned so far:

  1. Love is a skill. (The Course of Love, Alain de Botton)
  2. Love is a mystery. (Handwritten card, Max Mendoza)
  3. Great love and great achievement require great risk. (Dalai Lama XIV’s Instructions for Life)

I've written a three part series dedicated to these insights. 

Part I: Love is a skill.

We first learn to love from our parents. In their presence or from their absence. We feel love from the skin, which is why babies need to be held and touched. They say the skin is connected to our heart chakra’s and that we stretch our skin in yoga or athletics to open ourselves to more love.

Growing up I always had such sensitive skin (and I still do). I would get eczema from too much sand, sun, and salt. I couldn’t use products with any fragrance. I put layers and layers of Dermatologist recommended cream every time I got out of the shower.

I found it embarrassing. It made me feel different and weak. My skin was literally too soft. I was too sensitive. I longed to play in the ocean without breaking into rashes. I wished I could try different beauty products like other girls.

If only someone had told me then that you love through your skin and that my sensitivities were a strength. But maybe I was meant to learn now. A deeper appreciation for the lesson.

My sensitivities are not limited to my skin. I am a sensitive person.

Astrologically, a Cancer.

Strong on the outside. Soft on the inside. All I want to do is love. Fall in love everyday with people, places, experiences, ideas, emotions. I have worked diligently to design a life I truly love.

But when I say love is a skill, I mean that.

Everyday I wake up and I work to love and accept myself, to recognize my flaws, my insecurities, fears, and a spectrum of emotions. To not shy away from or try to cover up but rather to accept the wholeness of who I am in this moment.

I’ve invested an abundance of energy into learning about the psychology of self. I’ve taken countless assessments, attended many workshops, and been equipped with useful frameworks to think, see, and listen more clearly.

And yet making truly transformational shifts lies beyond the thinking and the doing. Transformation, rebirth comes from evolving and alchemizing your ontology, your state of BEING.

It's not always a clear path, at first, but if you ask source for guidance, it shall be given.

At present, my desire to is to shift from reactive to synchronistic. This goes beyond being proactive, a synchronistic being is in the flow of life, she knows herself and trusts herself, her sensibilities, instincts, and Intuition.

My advantage is I am passionately curious and committed to this ongoing study and mastery of self.

My disadvantage or challenge is I am human. I have blind spots and biases. By nature, I am deeply flawed. And further, I am trying to understand a me that is constantly changing. It’s like trying to walk a tightrope suspended between skyscrapers or trying to run a marathon on tectonic plates.

All I know so far: Love is a skill. Self-love is an everyday practice and I am a hungry, humble student with so much yet to learn. 

To the journey!